


undeserving

by mompasaurus



Category: Dangan Ronpa
Genre: Gen, Self-Harm, Suicide Attempt, Vomiting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-07
Updated: 2013-05-07
Packaged: 2017-12-10 18:08:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 508
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/788611
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mompasaurus/pseuds/mompasaurus
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>you don't deserve me. pitiful, worthless me.</p>
            </blockquote>





	undeserving

**Author's Note:**

> based on an 'imagine your otp' thing my friend sent to me hee haa hoo  
> i've never experienced this before so it may not be accurate gomen  
> italics are komaeda's thoughts btw

Komaeda's stomach turned, and leaned over the toilet. Within seconds, a mix of blood and things he had eaten earlier came pouring out of his mouth. The aftertaste in the back of his throat was vile, and he gagged and spit, trying to rid of it.

He looked down into the toilet, which was dyed red from the vomit.  _I deserve it._ He thought.  _I deserve to suffer. I'm worthless. I'm trash._ His head was spinning with unimaginable thoughts.

"Komaeda," A voice called from beyond the bathroom door. It was Hinata. "Are you alright?" 

_No._

_Don't.  
_

Komaeda's body quivered. "Of c-course, H-Hinata-kun...everything's fi--" He vomited again, and by the time he finished he was nearly out of breath. "..f-fine...!" 

_He can't see._

_He can't know._

"Please open the door," Hinata commanded, though his voice was soft. "You're obviously not okay."

A few tears streamed down Komaeda's face.   _He shouldn't care about me. He doesn't deserve me._ Why, then, did he long to be in Hinata's arms? "I....I...can't..." He stuttered.

"You..can't?" Hinata was obviously concerned. 

_He shouldn't be._

"Are you too weak? Do I need to take you to the hospital?"

Komaeda's voice shook. "N...No...it's just...." He figured arguing with him was useless. Hinata wasn't going to leave until he opened the door. Using almost all of his strength - he was indeed very weak - he extended his arm and unlocked the door. Then, he collapsed back over the toilet, hacking up more blood.

Hinata cautiously entered the bathroom, gently closing the door behind him. He leaned down beside Komaeda, who stretched further over the toilet, hoping he wouldn't see the blood.

"Y-You're home early..." Komaeda wiped his mouth with his sleeve, turned his head to Hinata and weakly smiled.

Hinata sounded puzzled. "I...It's the same time I always get home..." He said as he looked deeply into Komaeda's ill eyes. "Maybe you just lost track of time because you're so sick."

_Don't look at me._

"Y-Yeah...there's a stomach flu going around...y-you know..." Komaeda briefly glanced at the empty bottle of pills in the trash can beside the toilet. He hoped Hinata would believe him.

_I'm awful. Just look at what I did to myself._

Hinata just nodded. "Yeah. I heard something about that."

"Y-You should leave...I-I don't want you to catch it too..." Komaeda really didn't want Hinata to leave. But why should anyone care about him, even a little? He didn't deserve him. Nobody deserved him.

_You would be fine without me._

Hinata's hand touched his shoulder. "As long as you're like this, I'm not going anywhere. Besides, I never get sick. Haven't gotten really sick in a few years, actually." He grinned. "So don't worry about me."

_Don't smile at me_. 

"T-That's nice of you, Hinata-kun..." Komaeda vomited again. There was less blood this time.

_Don't waste your happiness on someone like me._

Hinata stayed with Komaeda until he had nothing left to throw up. But somewhere in his mind, Komaeda wished he had swallowed more pills.


End file.
